Divorce Lawyers, Financial Advisors Share How They Manage Money in Their Relationships

Couple with Money Issues
Image via iStock.

Divorce lawyers and couples counselors know how often money can lead to a divorce or an end of a relationship, writes Julia Carpenter for The Wall Street Journal.

That is why when they return home, they take steps to ensure they have a healthy relationship with both their finances and their partners.

One of the first things they recommend is to take all the time you need to talk about money issues, especially when it is uncomfortable. No matter how long you have been in a relationship, these conversations should never stop.

“If the credit-card statements are no longer available or passwords are changed or you used to have discussions about money and now you don’t, that may be the sign of something brewing around you,” said Lisa Zeiderman, a divorce lawyer in New York.

Another important step is to learn everything about household finances. Fred Hubler, CEO and Chief Wealth Strategist for Creative Capital Wealth Management Group, a retainer-based planning and alternative investment firm, says “one of the nonnegotiables we have is to meet with both spouses at the very beginning of the relationship. It’s important, says Hubler, “to consider both of their values and goals when developing a plan.”

“We provide a portal for our clients to see “everything” which usually helps reduce any uncertainties one of them could have.”

Valentina Shaknes, a New York City lawyer, has often represented successful, confident women who realized during their divorce just how little they knew of the overall household finances.

“They would really rely and defer to their husbands to manage their family finances, which is so different from their professional lives, where they’re running the show,” said Shaknes.

This can be corrected by using a statement of net worth. Each partner includes expenses, income, assets, liabilities, and more in detail, so each person has a full picture of the other’s financial situation.

You also need to be willing to change. When Adam Kol, a mediator, tax lawyer, and former financial adviser, started his relationship, he identified as “the saver” and his now-wife as “the spender.” They have since learned how to enjoy the best of both worlds.

“Like all couples, we moderate each other,” he said. “She helps me loosen up a little bit and enjoy the day-to-day.”

Read more about money management in The Wall Street Journal.


Save the Date – Open House

The first quarter of a new year offers an opportunity to evaluate how world events, politics and trends might influence and shape economic developments across the Delaware Valley and the United States.

With inflation here to stay and whispers of a global recession looming, now is the time to arm yourself with the information you need to ensure a successful 2023 for you and your business.

At 4:00 PM on the March 22, 2023, Fred Hubler, founder and Chief Wealth Strategist at Creative Capital Wealth Management Group and Greg Care, partner in the Limerick office of Maillie LLP, will share their perspective on global, national, state, and local economic trends and answer your questions about how IRS changes made in 2022 might impact your tax return in 2023.

Open to readers of the weekly Wiser Wealth column on VISTA Today. Attendance is limited to 25 Wiser Wealth readers.

Reserve your ticket on EventBrite today

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